Curse you, John Denver

Okay, maybe not quite. The truth is that I typically like John Denver… at least when we’re not doing anything related to packing bags, and my superman isn’t getting on a jetplane to leave any time soon. Naturally though, since I haven’t even thought of that song in 6 months, it was running through my head in an endless repetition when I had to drop my man off at the airport. Truth be told, it started several nights before my superman left. We were snuggled up on the couch, talking about the upcoming trip, dreading it together, and discussing how ridiculously ginormous my baby belly will probably be by the time he gets back. Somehow, in a joke, the jetplane song came up and we sang a couple lines very noisily and cheesily. Thus it began.  And there I was when I had to leave the airport, trying to keep smiling, wave, blow kisses, make smoochie faces, and drive, while the radio inside my head was wailing at terrific volume “he’s leaving ooooon a jeeeetplaaaaaane, don’t know when he’ll be back again… oh babe, I hate to goooo-ooo.
The first several days alone always feel like centuries, even more so than the rest of the duration of a trip. It feels like the days just drag on and on, lingering for abnormal stretches of time between dawn and dusk, no matter how many projects I work on and complete. I think it gets easier after the first week, though. Suddenly, there will be milestones to count back on and prove that although time may be ticking painfully slowly, it is in fact still ticking.
The pregnancy is a bit of a wild card for the time-clock this time, though. I’m not entirely sure if feeling like a malevolent bowling ball is trying to kick my ribs in will make the time pass even slower, or if the combined excitement of always being one day closer to having my superman back and meeting our baby girl will make it fly by. The pregnant energy thing is confusing too. I feel like cleaning/organizing/rearranging absolutely everything all at once, but one job can completely do me in for the day.
Just stay positive. You can do this. It’ll be over before you know it. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. That’s what I keep telling myself. I have a whole list of things to keep telling myself when I think I’d like to just curl up with a blanket on the couch for the next month and a half and wait for my superman to get back. Millions of people have done this before me, millions more will do it after me, and as far as trips go it could be much, much, much longer/worse. There really is some sort of unimaginable strength in realizing all that.
All that being said, if today ever ends, tomorrow I’m organizing the laundry room, and finishing up what I’ve started in the kitchen. I’m going to sloooowly make my way through the projects downstairs, and try to start work on the upstairs last because that’s what I’m most excited about. I’m also working on crocheting a sweater for my sweet little wigglebutt, and have plans to start a monkey baby blanket, as soon as I get the colors/type of yarn that I want. My pinterest board is absolutely FULL of goofy little crafty ideas that I’ll probably try to start knocking off my checklist if I actually run out of projects. Frankly, though, that shouldn’t happen. Last time my superman was gone, I was in the middle of school and didn’t really have time for any extra projects, although I ended up really wishing I had something for the weekends. This time I went overkill the other way. I’m scheduled to start school in a couple weeks (I was supposed to start today, but that was a fiasco for a whole different blog post), and I have a list as tall as I am of things I want to get done in these last weeks before the baby comes.
So here’s my statement of purpose for the saga of the next bit of time.  I will pray, not worry.  I will email my superman every single day.  I will feel our baby kick me in the ribs. I will turn up Pandora very loud to drown out the quiet.  I will stay so busy time has to go faster.  I will be fine.  And I will NOT listen to any John Denver until my superman is back.


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